From Stressed to Blessed: Why Grace Isn’t Just for Salvation | 005

In this episode of 'The Redeemed Perfectionist,' Leneé Pezzano dives into the true meaning of grace and how it extends beyond salvation into our everyday lives. She examines the misconceptions around grace and how perfectionists often fall into the trap of trying to earn God's love and approval. With references to both traditional teachings and personal experiences, Leneé offers practical advice on how to live by sustaining grace rather than perfectionism.

Introduction to Grace and Perfectionism
Grace. Grace. God's grace....

True or False: Understanding Grace
Let's play a little true or false....

The Redeemed Perfectionist's Mission
I'm Leneé Pezzano, a former gold star chaser...

Grace in Daily Life
A recent survey found that 90 percent of Christians see grace...

Lessons from the Church of Galatia
Believe it or not, even the early church wrestled...

The Disconnect Between Belief and Practice
The moment a perfectionist first realizes this disconnect...

Practical Steps to Abide in Grace
Let's get practical, because learning to abide in grace isn’t...

How to Use Rest as a Weapon Against Perfectionism
Resting in grace does not mean inactivity...

Conclusion and Next Week's Sneak Peek
Oh, one more thing before you run off and try...

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Transcript

From Stressed to Blessed: Why Grace Isn’t Just for Salvation | 005

Leneé Pezzano: [00:00:00] If you are just joining the Redeem Perfectionist podcast community and you chose to start with this episode, Then I urge you to listen to this intro. It's got some special information that's going to really help you understand the journey we're on.

However, if you've been with me this whole time, you can skip this next part. You've already heard it, and just fast forward to around three minutes, 14 seconds or so to get into the full episode. 

 [Transition music}

Leneé Pezzano: You know when something just feels a little bit off, it's like you know where you're supposed to be and you know you're doing what you're called to do and you're following the formulas, creating the content, and yet something. in your jiver just ain't jiving and in your knower, just ain't knowin? That has been me these last few weeks and honestly that screams misalignment.

[00:01:00]  I did not get into podcasting to become the best marketer or win a prize for having the best scripted episodes, I felt compelled to help you as a listener, understand God's heart and understand that there is a way to overcome perfectionism and that you don't have to do it alone. I came to breed relationship and to foster connection with you. as I share my own struggles and my victories through my own walk with the Lord, 

That's what I wanna create here.

The next few episodes were recorded before I had this little epiphany. So that said, you might feel like they are way more scripted and they are and less like we're just chatting over a cup of coffee. I decided that I was going to keep them as is. I really think it'll be fun to look back and enjoy this imperfect 

[00:02:00] journey as the spirit of God.

It basically weaves his revelation in and out of our souls. So if you're hearing this message, just know that this episode you're about to hear it still comes from the heart and from my own experience. 

Starting something new is messy. Every work of art is, and the perfectionist that we are will avoid doing the thing until it's well perfect. But sometimes you have to obey first, and then the understanding follows. Sometimes God says, go and trust me that making mistakes will happen and you're gonna be okay because I'm with you.

This journey is not for the faint of heart, but it is worth every price paid to get to today, 

So, thank you for caring, for being gracious, for being patient. For hearing my heart, and most of all, I thank you for 

[00:03:00] pursuing the Lord and for believing that there is something better for you than where you have been to this point. 

[Transition music]

Grace. Grace. God's grace. Grace that will pardon in and clan within. Grace. Grace. God's grace. Grace that is greater than all our sin.

I love that hymn. It's called Grace Greater than our Sin. It reminds me of the power of the gospel. But what if I told you that perfectionists are often found living in another gospel?

Let's play a little true or false. God's definition of 

[00:04:00] grace means overlooking your sins. What do you think? True or false? Oh, you're waiting for me to answer, aren't you? Come on now, you didn't really think I would just hand it to you That easily, did you? We are actually going to unpack the definition of grace together in today's episode of the Redeemed Perfectionist.

Leneé Pezzano: If you've been in traditional Christian communities for any amount of time,

you likely have heard the acronym for grace, God's riches at Christ's expense. Grace. Oh, how I quoted that hundreds of times in my walk with the Lord. Here's another one. I'm relatively sure you know. We are saved by grace through faith. Awesome. Tell me again what grace is. If I asked you 

[00:05:00] what grace is, you might say it's God's unmerited favor, right? Jesus took your place on the cross? And you would be absolutely right. But do you ever feel like you still have to prove yourself to Him?

I can tell you I believed for years that I knew what grace was and the role it played in my salvation. But if you had asked me if He delighted in me just as I was, I wouldn't have known how to answer. I believed in grace for salvation, but not for my everyday failures. You might recall last week in episode four, we discussed definition decay.

The idea that familiar words can lose their true meaning over time, especially when they're overused.

 [00:06:00] It happens when we hear a word so often, like grace, that we stop really thinking about what it means. Instead of carrying its full depth and power, it just becomes a vague concept. What if, all this time, the answer to your freedom is hiding in the shadows of the real meaning of grace? I'm gonna be vulnerable with you for a moment.

For years, I suffered from believing God was not pleased with me unless I had performed perfectly. I felt like I would have to check all the spiritual boxes, read my Bible daily, memorize scripture, pray the right way. Servant church, sin less and less, just to be sure God still loved me. The thought of messing up made me anxious, as if one wrong move could make God disappointed, distant or [00:07:00] worse, could mean I would be kicked out of the kingdom. 

 I could not comprehend God's compassion, tenderness, and grace, and I certainly didn't believe it applied to me unless I earned it. Today on the Redeemed Perfectionist, we're asking this, If grace is truly free, why do you and I still feel like we have to earn it?

So if you've ever felt like you have to check all the boxes just to stay in God's good graces, listen up, because today we're going to break down what grace really means and how it will empower you to overcome anything the enemy throws your way. Hi sis. I'm Lenee' Pezzano, a former gold star chaser now chasing after God's heart and a battle tested warrior on a mission to expose the enemy's lies about God's expectations of 

[00:08:00] you. I had no idea that one day the beloved hymn, grace greater than our sin, would shape the very calling of my life. What Satan intended for evil. Keeping me trapped in shame and perfectionism is now used to create a warrior in you. I am on a mission to help you discover authentic versus counterfeit grace so you can stop second guessing God's love for you and learn to accept yourself in the midst of imperfections.

It's no easy task, even a little scary, to transform a belief that you've carried for so long. You might find our Redeemed Perfectionist Facebook community a safe haven you need on this journey. Be sure to connect via the link in the show notes. [00:09:00] 

 A recent survey found that 90 percent of Christians see grace as the core of understanding salvation. In other words, they know and accept saving grace. Like receiving a golden ticket to heaven. That was me! I clutched that ticket tightly, grateful for my entry. But I had no idea. Grace was also my all access past to daily freedom.

 Here's where it gets tricky for a perfectionist.

At the heart of perfectionism is a core belief that whispers, I must earn my worth through flawlessness or I will never be enough. It's like running on a spiritual hamster wheel. Exhausting, never ending, and leading absolutely nowhere. Perfectionists can accept saving grace, 

[00:10:00] but when it comes to daily life, we act like grace has an expiration date.

We see it as a one time event, not an ongoing invitation. Instead of resting in it, we keep trying to, quote, qualify for what's already ours. Like constantly reapplying for a job that we've already been hired for. That was also me. Would you like to hear something encouraging? You are not alone in this struggle.

Believe it or not, even the early church wrestled with the same issue, trying to add fine print to God's grace as if salvation came with hidden conditions. To best illustrate, let's take a quick trip back in time to the Church of Galatia. where the Apostle Paul had preached the gospel. These were folks just like you and me.

[00:11:00] People who had heard the good news of Jesus, responded in faith, and genuinely wanted to live for him. But then something happened that made Paul practically shake his head in disbelief. In Galatians 1 6, he writes, I am astonished that you are so quickly deserting the one who called you to live in the grace of Christ and are turning to a different gospel. 

Some influential voices had crept into the church and started spreading a toxic message. Faith in Jesus isn't enough. You also need to follow the Jewish law, circumcision, rituals, and rule keeping. If you really want to be saved, sure does sound like the voices in my head. They were basically the first century perfectionists, turning grace into a to do list and unknowingly walking 

[00:12:00] straight into spiritual exhaustion, not to mention a disconnect from Jesus.

In other words, they were falling into a trap that suggested they could obtain salvation through their works, which of course. Isn't the gospel at all? Sound familiar? These Galatian believers had started in grace, but were now trying to finish by their own effort. And honestly, that's exactly what we perfectionists do too.

We believe that God's grace is enough to save us, but when it comes to our daily lives, our mistakes, our struggles, our relentless inner critic, we slip right back into earning mode. We try to hustle for his love, perform for his approval. and perfect ourselves into worthiness. 

[00:13:00] here is the game changer.

Grace isn't just a one-time gift to get you into heaven. It's your daily power source. 

Like a spiritual caffeine IV drip, but way better. When you mess up at work and your inner critic starts screaming, grace reminds you that your worth isn't tied to your performance and enables you to stop the noise. When you snap at your kids, again, and feel like the worst mom ever, grace helps you to apologize, receive forgiveness, and move forward instead of spiraling into guilt.

When you see that perfectly curated life on social media and start feeling behind, Grace whispers, You're already enough because God says so. And when you're lying awake at night overanalyzing 

[00:14:00] that awkward conversation from earlier, Grace says, Psst, go to sleep. I've got this.

The moment a perfectionist first realizes this disconnect between the grace they believe in and the grace they live by, it's like taking a deep breath after holding it for years. It's both freeing and terrifying. So what now?

How do you actually abide in sustaining grace instead of falling back into perfectionism's trap? Paul gives us the answer in Galatians 5:1. It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery. Grace frees us. But we have to choose to live in it.

 [00:15:00] Abiding in grace means unlearning perfectionism and replacing it with trust. It means practicing rest instead of striving, receiving love instead of performing for it, and walking in the spirit instead of being enslaved to our own impossible standards. Now, if you're anything like me, the moment you realize this disconnect, Your first instinct is to, can you guess?

Fix it. That instinct may sound something like, oh no, I, I I've been relying on my own strength instead of grace. Let me just work really hard at resting in grace. I'll, I'll make a checklist. I'll read three books. I'll set a goal to achieve full surrender by next Tuesday. How close did I get? 

[00:16:00] Here's the thing.

Trying to strive your way into grace is like a drowning person trying to swim harder instead of just grabbing the life preserver that's right in front of them. The more you flail, the more exhausted you get. So what should you do when you realize you've been running on self sufficiency instead of sustaining grace?

Let's get practical, because learning to abide in grace isn't about doing more, it's about trusting more. Firstly, I invite you to pause and acknowledge that grace is already here. Before you rush to fix yourself, take a deep breath and say, God's grace is sustaining me right now, even in this struggle.

Maybe a simple prayer could be, Lord, I am tempted to take control, but I surrender 

[00:17:00] to your grace instead. Secondly, how about you trade the scorecard for surrender? Perfectionists love measuring progress. Instead of asking, am I getting better at resting in grace? Maybe ask, Am I trusting God more today than yesterday?

Oh, I love that actually. That's even speaking to me right now. Remember, you're not earning grace. You are receiving it. Thirdly, catch the inner critic and respond with truth. When the inner critic says you should be doing more, respond with truth. God's power is made perfect in my weakness, 2 Corinthians 12 9.

Replacing perfectionist pressure with biblical truth is the most powerful approach. 

[00:18:00] Philippians 1:6 says, he who began a good work in me will carry it to completion. I don't have to do more. I just need to receive more.

He's going to finish the work in me. Fourthly, rest as a weapon against perfectionism. resting in grace does not mean inactivity. It means trusting while you move forward. Here's a really great idea that a friend of mine gave me. Take intentional grace breaks throughout the day, meaning pause, pray, and remind yourself God is carrying you. 

Not the other way around. Fifthly, surround yourself with grace reminders. Scripture post it notes are great ideas. I used to have them all over my refrigerator. Set alarms with truth-based affirmations on your 

[00:19:00] phone. Play worship music or even frequently talk with that mentor or friend who speaks grace over your life.

the more you see and hear grace, the more natural it becomes to live in it. And lastly, celebrate small steps of trust. If you let go of control, even once today, celebrate. That's a win. Perfectionism says you're not doing enough. Grace says even the smallest step of trust is enough. 

 Here's a little extra dose of encouragement for you. Zechariah 4. 10 says, Do not despise these small beginnings, for the Lord rejoices to see the work begin. How awesome is that? by the way, when you listen to my trailer, remember I talked to you about how I bought myself flowers?

[00:20:00] you got it. I have learned to celebrate the small steps of trust along the way. So, maybe treat yourself with that pedicure you've been wishing you had or buy yourself some flowers too, friend. You're worth it. Just in case you didn't catch it, breaking up with perfectionism is a process. you don't just return the engagement ring and walk away.

It's, more like awkwardly running into your ex at the grocery store every single week. if you're anything like me, you've probably wished there were some kind of grace injection that would instantly rewire your brain. Oh, if only, but no, it's a daily walk, not a crash course. and honestly. That might just be in the top two aha moments I have had in this walk with him, right up there with realizing that.

yes, coffee's biblical, 

[00:21:00] Hebrews, get it? Oh, sis, take a deep breath. You're not failing.

You're learning. And the good news? God is not impatiently tapping his foot, waiting for you to get it together. He's already right here, sustaining you with grace, one imperfect step at a time. So go forth, trust a little more, strive a little less, and most importantly, don't forget to laugh when you catch yourself trying to take the wheel again. I would not recommend trying this journey alone because, let's be honest, perfectionism thrives in isolation. Like that weird mold growing on the leftovers you swore you'd eat. Oh, rip last Tuesday's lasagna. Here's what you can do instead. First, join the Redeemed Perfectionist Facebook community.

 [00:22:00] It's a place where we remind each other that rest is holy, mistakes are allowed, and nobody gets extra credit for burnout.

Secondly, subscribe to the podcast, the Redeem Perfectionist. That way, every episode will magically appear in your feed, kind of like Grace, except you actually have to click a button for this one. And finally, who can you think of that would benefit from hearing this episode?

Would you share it with her. Because let's face it, we all know somebody who needs to hear this. Maybe it's your Bible study buddy, your overachieving coworker, or that one friend who alphabetizes her spice rack for fun. We love her, but she needs this. All right, that's it for today. Keep taking imperfect steps forward.

And remember, God's grace is bigger than your to do list. 

[00:23:00] See you next time.

Oh, one more thing before you run off and try to perfect your ability to stop perfecting. Just kidding. Just kidding. Let me give you a sneak peek at next week's episode. We are talking about love is kind, which, spoiler alert, also applies to how you treat yourself. Yes. That means no more talking to yourself like an over caffeinated drill sergeant. So if you've ever side eyed yourself in the mirror or given yourself a mental smackdown for not being good enough, You'll want to tune in. Let's trade self sabotage for self kindness, shall we?

I'm going